Smart but Scattered: The Revolutionary "Executive Skills" Approach to Helping Kids Reach Their Potential First Edition

My 9-year-old daughter, "A," has been struggling with staying on task. I've been struggling to parent her through it! When a friend talked about her daughter's ADHD diagnosis, it just clicked. A hasn't received that diagnosis, but seeing her struggles, we decided to start by learning how to help her in ways that don't involve medication. (There is absolutely a place for ADHD meds, but if we can avoid them, particularly while she's a growing kid, that feels like a positive.)I looked on Amazon and ordered this book. I just finished it today. It's EXCELLENT. It explains what executive skills are (various skills that help one function and "get things done.") I understand both my kids better, as well as understanding my own executive skills strengths and weaknesses. I have a great toolbox of new strategies and ideas to pull from as we get back to "real life" next week.In fact, I'm already using some of the things I've learned. When the kids were packing to return home from our Christmas trip, my nagging wasn't helping A get things done. So I remembered that kids with difficulties in these areas often need to do things in short bursts with frequent rewards. I told A that for every 10 items she packed, she could film one slow-motion video on my phone. It worked like a dream, and the atmosphere in the room totally changed--laughter instead of frustration. The next day when we got home, I used the same strategy for unpacking, challenging her a little more (15 items for each video.) I don't remember A complaining once, and her unpacking was done in a fairly timely fashion. I still had to remind her to get back on task a couple of times, but it didn't feel like a battle.Of course, different strategies work for different kids. The frequent little rewards work for A because while she has weaknesses in the areas of task initiation and working memory, she has a strength in the area of goal-directed persistence. One thing I loved about this book is that it showed me her strengths, which helps devise strategies to help her in the areas where she struggles.We will be creating a new plan to help A with her after-school routine (the biggest at-home struggle currently--supposed to focus on one at a time), and we're already communicating with her teachers about how to help her succeed more at school. Both teachers are so glad we want to work with them in an effort to help A.A note on the length of the book--it looks pretty intimidating, and if you have a weakness in the executive skill of time management, as I've learned I have, that can spell disaster for a long, nonfiction book! I was pleased to find that a lot of parts were "skimmable." A large portion of the book is composed of chapters that address each executive skill individually. I merely skimmed the chapters covering skills that my kids don't struggle with. I also skimmed quite a bit of the beginning of the book, when the authors go into a lot of detail of how executive skills develop, brain development, etc. It's good info, but I was anxious to get on with the practical tips, and I didn't end up needing all the scientific basis to make sense of the rest of the book.

Another parent here. I have three highly gifted kids who nevertheless seem unable to accomplish simple tasks. A friend recommended this book, and it's forcing me to endure a complete paradigm shift, not only about my expectations for them, but of my own weaknesses in this area. Sure, I've had trouble staying organized, I start tasks only to leave them half-completed, and I feel like I have far more potential than I produce. But until I took the inventory for parents in this book, I didn't realize how truly weak my own executive skills are all around (unless I'm inspired, and then I'm a machine! ... just like my daughter). My husband took the quiz and -- not surprisingly -- his EF (executive function) skills are nearly off the charts on the other end. He laughed a little as he said he wondered how honest I was going to be, but he agreed with my self-assessment. Suddenly, I understand why a disastrous house sends me into tears, but he can get to work and make it spotless in a couple hours. But this book also showed me that it's not an inherent personality failure on my part -- it's that I never learned these skills properly! After just a weekend of talking about some issues together, my daughter (8) and I have created strategies to help us with our organizational skills. I'm also staying more patient with my 5-yr-old son, who is pretty much a 1 on emotional control (but quite good with organization).This book isn't an instant silver bullet solution, but it provides new ways of thinking and conceptualizing about your children's (and your own) strengths and weaknesses. If your children are also very smart, I also *highly* recommend reading this book together with:Living With Intensity: Understanding the Sensitivity, Excitability, and the Emotional Development of Gifted Children, Adolescents, and Adults When you understand low and evolving EF skills in combination with overexcitabilities/intensities, you can finally stop asking, "What have I done wrong? Why are *MY* kids -- who are otherwise so bright and capable -- so sensitive/dramatic/disorganized/fidgety/distractable/loud/rebellious, etc.?" Because they *aren't* like other kids. They are shooting stars who will challenge but delight and amaze you! And the _Smart but Scattered_ book will help them manage those overexcitabilities through developing better executive skills.

This is another gem of a book. Dawson and Guare, the authors, have quite a few of these books ranging from kids, teensSmart but Scattered Teens: The "Executive Skills" Program for Helping Teens Reach Their Potential, to adultsThe Smart but Scattered Guide to Success: How to Use Your Brain's Executive Skills to Keep Up, Stay Calm, and Get Organized at Work and at Home. I love how they not only give you ideas and checklists to fill out for your kids strengths and weaknesses, but they also include a version for parents to assess themselves. This is a great way to begin a nice dialogue and could be very eye-opening. Once you have informally assessed your child's strengths and weaknesses, each chapter focuses on a specific area to target with strategies. I have found this extremely beneficial for my role as a parent but as a teacher I find myself recommending this book more and more.If this sounds interesting to you or like you want to read more on executive skills here are some other products I have found personally helpful and recommend for families, check out:The Sensory Child Gets Organized: Proven Systems for Rigid, Anxious, or Distracted KidsThe Out-of-Sync ChildADDitude

This book helps the reader to understand children with attention difficulties. A bit dry, I found it a long read, but I did gather some informative things to help me navigate life with my ADHD child.

It was age appropriate